Dear Jon Gosselin,

I'm not a big fan of your show.  I've seen it a few times.  My wife occassionally watches it and she has read Kate's book. I always found the TV show very stressful to watch.   However, I think that might just be the point, having 8 kids is stressful.

It has been interesting to follow your rise in fame from a guy with 6 new babies not sure how to survive to a media darling on top of the world.   No other time in history has the world been able to watch a person in real-time go through this type of transition.   That's the amazing thing and scary thing about this media world that we live in.   The world will lift you up and then tear you apart before you know it.

I must admit I was surprised when all of the marriage troubles came to light.  I didn't want to believe you were cheating on your wife.  At first I thought it was just a publicity stunt.  Once I found out it was for real, I was saddened.   What a perfect platform you and Kate had to demonstrate what a good marriage could look like.   No doubt there were troubles with the marriage.  No doubt life was hard.   No doubt you and Kate had differences and fought.   I just described every marriage in America.   Marriage isn't easy, but I do believe it's a covenant we make that should not be broken.

Did you think it was Kate's job to make you happy?  (it's not).  Did you think that living in the spotlight would be easy?   The life that you and Kate created that paid you lots of money is the same life that would destroy you if you let it.  I can't imagine the constant attention of the media and the unrelentless pursuit for gossip.    I'm sure that is hard, but it's the life you created.  Deal with it.

Do you really think divorce is the best outcome for your family and kids?  

I want to scream at you:  Fight For Your Marriage!  Do the right thing.  Take a stand to do everything you can to make your marriage healthy.   I believe it's never too late.  What an opportunity you have to show America what a real man looks like.   What an opportunity you have to show the men of this country how to love their wives.

With God all things are possible.  Put your trust in God in this situation and let Him take all of the glory for the outcome.   I dare you.

This may sound judgmental, but I’d say most people pretty much only look out for themselves.  It’s rare to find a person that truly puts others above themselves.  If you’re a follower of Jesus, isn’t that what we’re called to do?  Isn’t that what Jesus did?  He gave himself as a ransom for many and humbled himself even to a death on a cross.

Wow.  I know I don’t live that way most of the time.  Sure, I’ll get a good one in every once in a while and then I’ll hold on to that one for too long.   “Hey, I did such and such for so and so 3 months ago!  Isn’t that good enough?”   Um, well, no.

I’ve been chewing on this verse for a while now:

Philippians 2:21  For everyone looks out for his own interests, not those of Jesus Christ.

Go and read Philippians 2, it’s so good in The Message.  Now that's what I call living an Intentional Life.

What do you think?

[image by Jeff Kubina]